No More Bad Hair Days, Part II

Well, thank God He gave me hair that I don't like.  Oh, I appreciate that I have it.  I just don't like it.  Never have.  It's been pulled back in a barrette for the last two months as if I'm a seven year old and the sides are too short to stay in a ponytail.  So irritating.  So I always use my sunglasses as a hairband to get the sides off of my face, and actually go to bed most every night with them still sitting on my head.  That's a nice look.  Well, in a couple of months I won't be needing my sunglasses on my head anymore because my doctors have decided to change my chemo treatments and put me back on one of the drugs I originally started out on which makes you lose your hair.  I cried for all of 9 seconds. To my mother-in-law.  (Sorry!)  I think I cried because I remember I looked like a lamb when it grew back in.  And I know I cried because I'm already mourning the loss of my eyelashes.  I love my lashes.  Those were hard for me to lose last time.   But, thank God for an abundance of fake eyelashes everywhere from CVS to Target.  If applied correctly, they even look better than my own.

So after getting the news, I picked up my daughter from school and ran over to Joanne's to buy some cute fabric to make bandanas out of.  Three years ago, I bought cute French country napkins from CostPlus (which I still have), but I thought it would be fun to have her help me pick out a few cute prints.  (See our stash?)  Heck, if I have any leftovers, I can make some cute pillows for my backyard chairs.  And while I'm lounging in the sun, I'll match them!  You know me, I just love to color coordinate.

When I picked up my son from his school, I told him I was going to lose my hair again.  I told him I couldn't wait to come to one of his baseball games as a bald woman, with huge gold hoops on and big red lips. I made him laugh.

Bottom line?  You gotta laugh.

I can't help but think that I'll be able to reach out to so many more women when I actually look like I have cancer.  If I do say so myself, I don't really think I look the part.  Heck, I have hair!  Didn't you think that everyone going through chemo lost their hair?  I did, until I realized that not all drugs make you lose it. Who knew?  I just think that so many more opportunities will come my way when they see a scarf-wearing woman walking their way.  I look forward to that part of it.

So good-bye blow dryer, straightening iron, barrettes, bobby pins, ponytail holders and sunglasses.  I will not miss you!  However, eyelash curler and mascara -- you will be missed.

Bloom...

Happy Tuesday!  And I do mean "happy" because my last three days were not.  I ended up in the hospital on Saturday with an obstructed colon.  Jealous?  A cat scan showed that my small intestine was a tad blocked, but the chances were good that it would unblock itself without any procedures.  Good, I thought, because the procedures were either sticking a tube down my nose and into the intestine (no thank you) or surgery (no thank you again).   Each doctor would come into my room and with their fingers crossed would say, "Let's hope it just straightens itself out on its own."  And I would place my hands in prayer and say, "Yep, I'll pray that it does."  Thank you, Lord, for this answer to prayer.   I may need to have a small bowel study performed next week.  And clearly, I'd rather study for the SATs again.   Wouldn't you?  

Anyway,  before the weeks get away from me, I wanted to invite you to Calvary's Bloom Women's Luncheon & Fashion Show on Saturday, April 13th.  Donna and I were asked to speak about His Flower Girls and we're thrilled to do so.  Really thrilled because we actually met at that event just two years ago.  Funny how God works, huh?  

Bloom is an annual event put on by the women's ministry group at Calvary.  The guest speakers are Linda and Jen Barrick, a mother and daughter from Virginia, who know very well that God is real.  Their verse is, "May the God of hope fill you with joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13.  I won't reveal too much about their story, but I can promise you it will be good.  Yeah, not missing that one.

So it's from 10 to 1:30 pm and tickets are $35.  There's also a boutique.  Tickets went on sale on March 1st, so if you're interested, sign up very soon on Calvary's website at calvarycc.org because it will sell out.

And if any of you would like to fill in for me for the small bowel study, feel free to let me know!  

One Seed...

I know I haven't blogged in a while, but I didn't really have any thing to say.  I've been laying low as I got hit with the flu, and I'm still in recovery mode.  Cancer and the flu are not a good mix.  Yeck.  

But I heard something today while I was at my bible study that I wanted to share with all of you.  

I love stories like this.

So our teacher Michele Telfer (amazing!) is teaching a class on the book of Acts, which in essence, means we're learning about the Holy Spirit.  And she spoke this morning about God using ordinary people to do extraordinary things.  In fact, I heard Michele speak at a conference a few years ago, and this was the first time I had ever heard that phrase before.  The moment I heard it, it sunk into me.  Deep.  And it's never left me.  

Well, she asked our class this question: "Who has ever heard of Mordecai Ham?"  No one's hand went up.

She then began to tell us this story.

Mordecai Ham was a preacher who, back in 1934, held a revival meeting in North Carolina.  Another gentleman knew of the revival meeting and wanted a young boy he knew to go with him.  The 16-year-old boy had no interest in going.  However, in order to entice the teenager, the older gentleman told the boy he could drive his old vegetable truck to the meeting.  Well, what teenager could resist that offer?  So off the two of them went.   

The teenager in the story is Billy Graham.  The older gentleman who brought him to the revival meeting is kind of a mystery.  Oh, his name is probably written down somewhere, but his name is not a household name.  (Neither is Mordecai Ham's for that matter).  Yet he's the one responsible for introducing the young Billy Graham to the Lord.  Kind of a big deal, don't you think?  Dr. Graham is responsible for the salvation of, oh, I don't know, thousands upons thousands of people.  But no one remembers the older gentleman's name.  

And that's the point.  

No one needs to remember your name in order for you to change a life.  

I love stories like this because I think I have been quietly obsessed with becoming "someone" who somewhere changes lives.  I admire so many people who do that.   You know my prayer, "God, use me!  Let's have fun together!  Blow my mind!"  

But the bottom line is that we don't have to be a preacher or a teacher or a writer or an actor to have a platform in which to share our faith.  We could be a guy with an old vegetable truck who offers to take some kid to church.  And look how that one turned out.   

My girlfriend Tara who is also in the class told us about a couple she met on a plane.  They started chatting, they invited her to their church and after she met them there, they bought her a Bible.  Guess what?  She lifted up that very same Bible from close to 20 years ago and said, "This is the Bible they bought me."  Because of that one plane ride, Tara's kids, husband and so many of her friends  have come to know the Lord.  In fact, I watched this girl baptize bunches of girls in a hotel pool at 10 o'clock at night at a retreat just a few years ago.     

Who knows what flowers will bloom when you throw a seed into the ground.

Got one?

Jesus Calling Strikes Again...

Well, I just found out that another friend of mine passed away last week.  It was a heart attack.  But keep reading -- I promise this post won’t make you cry.  

I had met Jiva through my husband. We saw each other on occasion.  Not a lot.  He knew I had cancer and he read my blog.  Just recently, he had had a stroke.  This certainly jarred his faith.  He was from Bombay, but attended a local Catholic church.  Soon after his stroke, he asked if he could come to our church with us.  We met him at Calvary and took him to lunch after the service.  After, he asked if he and I could continue to meet on a regular basis.  Because, according to him, he found my faith “utterly fascinating.”  So we met in Calabasas one day for lunch.  As I shared my faith, he stared intently at me.  He clearly was puzzled. "How do you have such strong faith given your diagnosis?" he asked.  I had brought him a Jesus Calling book and handed it to him during our lunch.  I told him it was one of my most favorite books ever.  While we were talking, I wrote down a few verses inside the jacket cover.  Can’t really recall what I wrote, but he acted like I was giving him the keys to eternity.  In fact, I was.

I would receive many emails and texts from him after our first lunch.  The first text read, “Reading Jesus Calling soothes my heart, but I must say I then get back to the same thing unfortunately.  But gradually, very very gradually, I am submitting myself to Him.  Not fast enough though.”

I loved that he kept reading it.  

I received this text just six days before he died.

“Yesterday’s reading in Jesus Calling: Walk by faith, not by sight. The book you gave me is a magical carpet.  It’s so much joy.  Thank you, Ruthie.”

I wrote him back, “Love that u love it!!  Read it always.  xo.”

Looking back, I’m so comforted by his words.  I’m also comforted that the Lord took him quickly as Jiva had a huge fear of having another stroke and not having anyone to take care of him.  When I went back to re-read the page that Jiva was referring to in his last text I saw, “As I help you get back on your feet, you tell Me how worried you are about the cliffs up ahead.  But you don’t know what will happen today, much less tomorrow...Walk by faith, not by sight, trusting Me to open up the way before you.”

I know those words were written just for Jiva to read that day.  As he so feared the cliffs up ahead.  Don’t we all?

So as I write this, I encourage each one of you to carve out some time to share your faith with someone.  Maybe even share your favorite book. 

I ran out to Costco today and bought 20 more of my favorite books in honor of Jiva.  He would have loved to know that because of him, more of these special books will be given to others.  I hope this beautiful book brings them closer to God too.

The Collector...

Does anyone just love getting their mail?  I do.  Our mailbox is usually full of catalogs and junk mail, but there's still the anticipation of what could be inside.  Especially when you're waiting for something.  And it's even better when you've forgotten what you're waiting for and it catches you by surprise.  That's what happened to me yesterday.

My daughter, my friends and their daughters all went away for a little vacation up to Los Olivos.   We stayed in an adorable little cottage just yards away from this charming, old town. 

(I'll be posting about it on the christian girl's cottage blog soon).

Well, we left Thursday and returned home last night.  After unloading all of our luggage and our many thrift store finds (oh, don't think that wasn't gonna happen!), I went out to the mailbox.  On the very top of the mail, sat a package from Guideposts Magazine.  As I opened it, I saw a letter that read, "We are pleased to accept your story about learning to use your gift for our feature, The Collector in our Angels on Earth magazine."

Well, be still my heart.

The editor had already emailed me a copy of the final story and the photo editor had already asked me for a photo of my license plate.  But I kind of forgot about that.  What I submitted to them was an 800-word feature on my obsession with personalized license plates.  What ran is a 100-word story.  They  edited it down to what they needed.  As they say in publishing, that's the way the cookie crumbles.  (I'm not in publishing -- I honestly have no idea what they say.)

But what fun it was to open the magazine and try and find my little story.  I looked in the table of contents and found The Collector.  I knew it was mine.    

I loved reading it and actually admired how they condensed my big ol' story down to just a few paragraphs.  That's really hard to do.  I took several editing classes in college and actually hated them.  I would rather write than edit someone else's work.  I loved watching Rachel's face as I showed her and Jake's names in the story.  "I'm famous!" she squeeled.  Yeah, you better run out and buy a few Sharpies as you'll be hunted down in the Von's parking lot.  Not.  

But what I love the most is that God blessed me with my first story published in this magazine.  First off, it's in a publication put out by my favorite little magazine Guideposts.  Call me an old soul, but Reader's Digest, Guideposts and Better Homes and Gardens have always been special to me.  Even when I was 10.  

And I love that my message about using your gift is out there for all to read.  I'm passionate about that message.  Big time.  

So with the published story comes a $50 honorarium (look out Goodwill -- here I come!), complimentary copies of the magazine and a one-year complimentary subscription to Angels on Earth.  Love it.

Here's the last two sentences of the story:

"If something as small as a license plate can be used for good purpose, just imagine what we can do with the talents and blessings God gives us.  That's a message I'm proud to carry wherever I go."

So very true.

So if this post sounds annoyingly familiar as I love writing about it, have you scratched your head yet and said, "So how can I bless others with my gift?"  If not, then may I encourage you to do so?  If you're stuck and you don't think you have a gift, you are so wrong.  And to prove it, email me.  Email me and tell me you're stuck.  And I'll do my best to un-stick you.

xoxo

    

What is Getting You Through This?

I lost a friend on Saturday.  

But I had the pleasure of having lunch with him back in November.  

We had a great time.  We laughed.  And we cried.  And we made some beautiful memories.

I met Tom about 25 years ago.  His wife Ann had dated my husband Ed in high school and in college.  In fact, one of our first dates was to their wedding. 

"I am NOT going to your ex-girlfriend's wedding," I told Ed.  

"Yes you are."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes you are."

Well, I went.  Begrudingly.

And low and behold, I actually liked Ann and her new husband Tom.  A lot.

Fast forward to roughly two years ago.  Tom was diagnosed with late stage cancer.  I ran into Tom and Ann on a few occasions at our oncologist's office.  I noticed that he would say hi to me, then continue reading his book.  He just didn't seem like himself.  I chalked it up to not feeling very well.

A few months later, Ann called to wish me a happy birthday.  She told me that Tom was kind of irritated with me because I acted a little too happy to have cancer.  However, she went on to say, "But Tom is a lot like you now."  

"Really, what do you mean?"

"He shares his faith now with whoever he's sitting next to when he's down at USC."

Just then, I heard Tom's voice in the background yell, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RUTHIE!"  

He then got on the phone.  

"Oh, Tom.  You sound so good!" I told him, choking back my tears.  

He started crying.  We both did.

I told him that we needed to have lunch, just the two of us.  We met a few days later.

I had never had lunch with just Tom.  We were friends because our spouses were friends first.  But on that day, we were friends.  Really good friends.   We talked about things that only two people going through this journey could share with each other.   

I remember three very special things about that lunch.

First, he was waiting outside the restaurant for me when I arrived.  When we hugged hello, he said he loved me.  When we left, he hugged me good-bye and told me he loved me.   He was radiating love.

Secondly, while we were eating, he lit up like a Christmas tree when he spoke of going to heaven.  I remember sitting across the table from him and witnessing the glow that came over him as he shared how amazing it will be.  It was beautiful to see.

And this is my favorite memory from our lunch.  

I asked him how he shares his faith when he sits down next to someone at chemo.  I told him that I've been doing this thing for three years now, and I still don't know exactly what to say.  

He thought about it for all of three seconds and said, "Why don't you just ask them, 'What's getting you through this?"

I knew that was gold to my ears the moment I heard it.  I actually got my iphone out of my purse and typed it in my notes so I wouldn't forget.  (See the photo I took during our lunch back on November 6th).  His thought was brilliant.  So simple, yet so brilliant.  

"What's getting you through this?"

 Heck, it applies to everything.  What's getting you through the toughest thing in your life? 

Our answer?  

Our relationship with Jesus.    

Such a simple question to begin such an important discussion.

When I read Ann's email on Saturday that Tom had passed away, my heart smiled.  He was now in the presence of Jesus.  And I know that's exactly where he was ready to be.   

He's So Into You...

February.  

Ahh, the month of love. 

The month we expect "him" to bring us flowers, a box of chocolates and a love letter.

The month we hope "he'll" tell us how much "he" adores us.  Despite the way we look in the morning without make-up on, despite the terrible moods we may fall into or despite the days when we're just downright nasty.  (I am on occasion.  You too?)

But He does adore us.

Every day.  

It's just that He doesn't wait until February to show us.

He lavishes us with flowers.  In our own backyard.

He lavishes us with His love letters every day.  

If only we'd just open them. 

He lavishes us with sweets every day.  Maybe just not in a heart-shaped box.

Bottom line?

He's so into you.

Madly.

Deeply.

Head over heals.

In love.  

With you.

xo xo.