Well, thank God He gave me hair that I don't like. Oh, I appreciate that I have it. I just don't like it. Never have. It's been pulled back in a barrette for the last two months as if I'm a seven year old and the sides are too short to stay in a ponytail. So irritating. So I always use my sunglasses as a hairband to get the sides off of my face, and actually go to bed most every night with them still sitting on my head. That's a nice look. Well, in a couple of months I won't be needing my sunglasses on my head anymore because my doctors have decided to change my chemo treatments and put me back on one of the drugs I originally started out on which makes you lose your hair. I cried for all of 9 seconds. To my mother-in-law. (Sorry!) I think I cried because I remember I looked like a lamb when it grew back in. And I know I cried because I'm already mourning the loss of my eyelashes. I love my lashes. Those were hard for me to lose last time. But, thank God for an abundance of fake eyelashes everywhere from CVS to Target. If applied correctly, they even look better than my own.
So after getting the news, I picked up my daughter from school and ran over to Joanne's to buy some cute fabric to make bandanas out of. Three years ago, I bought cute French country napkins from CostPlus (which I still have), but I thought it would be fun to have her help me pick out a few cute prints. (See our stash?) Heck, if I have any leftovers, I can make some cute pillows for my backyard chairs. And while I'm lounging in the sun, I'll match them! You know me, I just love to color coordinate.
When I picked up my son from his school, I told him I was going to lose my hair again. I told him I couldn't wait to come to one of his baseball games as a bald woman, with huge gold hoops on and big red lips. I made him laugh.
Bottom line? You gotta laugh.
I can't help but think that I'll be able to reach out to so many more women when I actually look like I have cancer. If I do say so myself, I don't really think I look the part. Heck, I have hair! Didn't you think that everyone going through chemo lost their hair? I did, until I realized that not all drugs make you lose it. Who knew? I just think that so many more opportunities will come my way when they see a scarf-wearing woman walking their way. I look forward to that part of it.
So good-bye blow dryer, straightening iron, barrettes, bobby pins, ponytail holders and sunglasses. I will not miss you! However, eyelash curler and mascara -- you will be missed.